Blue Jeans

Why are blue jeans the default? It's true, they are comfortable, but It seems random that the thing that people generally wear everyday is something relatively new to the clothing world. And something that is blue, not a more neutral black, white, or gray. And something that always tears in the knees after only a few hundred uses. And something that lets the cold and heat in easily. Is it a cheap material? Is that why? Was there some movie star that experimented with them long ago that created this standard of normal.

WHY are we using this blue, easily-tearable, strange fabric for 90% of our daily pants needs? Just an observation.

Love At Third Sight

October 19, 2010 (about a year ago): I attend a banquet for the Masters of Social Work program. I wasn’t really interested in the program, but they invited the top GPAs of each college and I wanted free food. There were maybe 40 students in attendance. Sitting at my table was a Jeff Whitlock. We became friends, eventually were accepted into the Strategy program together, and also see each other in the BYUSA office. After the banquet, Jeff and I walked to campus together. There was also a girl with us, but I didn’t remember very much about her, just that we talked about one of our mutual friends Emily. I remembered she had done folk dance as well.

Fast forward to November 2, 2011. I am now dating an awesome, beautiful girl named Kelli. We are talking and eventually find out that she was also in attendance at the banquet. We find out that she also knows Jeff Whitlock. We also find out that she walked with Jeff to campus after the banquet. She talked to a boy that she didn’t remember very well about a mutual friend named Emily. And about the fact that he was in folk dance.

WE TALKED!!! A year before we started dating, we talked, sort of met each other, and didn’t think anything of it! We barely remembered each other! Not til a year later did Kelli try out for murder mystery and we got to know each other and got to really start liking each other. I learned three things from this:

1. Love at first sight is probably over-rated.

Kelli and I are really liking/leading to loving each other. And we’re both extremely attracted to each other (or so she tells me ☺). But obviously, there wasn’t a magical rushing of the wind when we first met. Heck, we hardly remember the other person at all! Same thing when she walked into the audition room. I thought she was cute, but I didn’t right away envision it going as far as it has. It wasn't until our third encounter (in the taco bell line, haha) that I really started feeling major attraction/interest in her.

2. Who knows who you’re running into?

I have always loved thinking about who you’ve run into in your life without realizing it. Or finding your friend from kindergarten in your college business class. Stuff like that. I really hope that after we die we can see a video of all the funny coincidences and circumstances of running into people. It’s just so fun having a real-life example with my girlfriend!

3. Our lives are being guided.

Kelli and I started dating pretty quick; because we were ready and because it felt right. I don’t think a year ago we would have been ready. At that time she was in a pretty up and down relationship and I was about to start the longest relationship of my life. From both we learned a ton. We learned lessons and had experiences that really shaped who we are and how we view relationships. What IF Kelli and I had clicked a year ago and started dating? Maybe it would have worked out. But maybe we weren’t supposed to date yet, and were being taught and prepared for something to happen when it was supposed to. I’m a big believer in timing, and I know that God is as well. It’s awesome to see him orchestrate things.

So today as you go out, look around at those strangers walking by. You might be dating one of them in a year!

Jamie Rose

The other day my car Jamie Rose was in a dark parking lot and she was nudged by a dark pole. It got her tire axel just right to warrant a $400 repair (you’ll see below why it wasn’t financially worth it to repair). And somehow I knew right away, this was goodbye.

Jamie Rose has been the perfect first car. Red and sparkly black and too cool to believe. There’s something so liberating and exciting about buying getting the first one. I’ve always felt that your first car has got to be quirky out the wazoo, and Jamie certainly fit the bill. She:

-Doesn’t start with the key. I had to get it hotwired and push a switch by my knee to start it.
-Sometimes turns completely off when I turned left. Added a bit of excitement to the driving experience.
-Clicks whenever the steering wheel is turned.
-Leaks air out of her tires pretty bad, but never got a flat!
-Has a trunk that slams, and sometimes breaks the taillights when she does.
-Doesn’t lock. At all. Well, that’s not true. She locks, but doesn’t unlock. So, I never locked her ☺.
-Has a right windshield wiper that stopped working.
-Sometimes scrapes the road when going over bumps.
-Floods the floor of the back seat if the AC goes too long. That is, when the AC worked.

Jamie Rose was also full of stories. I remember when:
-I had 24 hours to make a 22 hour drive from Ogden, Utah to San Antonio, Texas. Jamie and I did a great job and made it! We got a ticket in New Mexico (it was a cheap-shot), and she flooded (see AC issue above), but we had quite a time.
-Her muffler went out in Arkansas. That was a loud journey ☺.
-At 3 in the morning in the middle of Illinois I opened her door after getting gas and her ALARM started going off. My first thought, “this thing has an ALARM SYSTEM?!” Eventually the police came, the alarm stopped, I slept in Jamie since she wouldn’t start, and I got her fixed in the morning.
-She sputtered to a stop right off an exit to American Fork with Eliza on my birthday. We tried jumping her and we set the cables on fire!
-One winter day the driver door stopped opening. So I had to climb out the passenger side. Then the next day it worked again. Silly Jamie playing tricks.

Yesterday I called several junkyards and used car places to find the best deal. Eventually I landed on a nice guy from Orem who fixes up cars. He offered me $300, which is a lot more than I was expecting, considering I bought it for $1000, had put almost two years in it, and it had some major replacements to be done. The Orem man was a really solid gent, and the thing I like most about it is that he’s going to try to fix Jamie up and re-sell her. Most of the other places were just going to use her for parts. I’m glad that Jamie is maybe going to get another chance and give some other young college guy the time of his life.

After the man buying the car told me he would pick it up in the morning and I pulled my stuff out of the trunk and the CDs out of the front, I had a few minutes alone with Jamie. It was sad. It felt very similar to the time I buried one of my good friends Xela, our parakeet. I told Jamie how much I loved her, and I ended up crying pretty bad. I know that cars are inanimate objects, but with how much we had seen together, I really felt like I was saying goodbye to a friend. A friend who had defied the odds and the laughter and shaped a big part of my college experience.

I’ll miss you Jamie Rose. Thanks for the memories!

Power Outage

Power Outages are the best. They make me want to play murder in the dark, eat vanilla pudding, tell scary stories with flashlights, and talk to everyone in the room.

Power Outages are great/unifying because all of a sudden you can't really do anything productive. You have the perfect excuse to do nothing! And to eat pudding and yadda yadda. I think it's also great because everyone has something in common all at once. Today when it happened I was in the bathroom and struck up a great conversation with a complete stranger, simply because we felt the common bond of the outage. It's like how big disasters unite countries, just that this one is a fun/harmless one.

So bring on the snow days, the AC failures, and the power outages. They're great!

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Time Thought

My friend Eliza mentioned a great point the other day. Time is man-made. The fact that there are 24 hours in a day is not an eternal principle. Time was invented by mankind. Minutes, Seconds, Clocks, Weeks, Years, and Days are just made-up measurements. I know that the sun goes up and down and that seasons come and go, but time really is a stress that we’ve placed upon ourselves.

This “week”, with starting school, time seemed to slow way way down. Like, if time didn’t exist I would almost swear to the fact that the past “168 hour week” felt almost twice as long as the “168 hours” before that. Could it be that it really was longer? My time has been more busy and full and somehow it’s just felt different. Would a man in a log cabin without a watch or a calendar view each “day” so much differently? Probably. Things would happen when they happened without a schedule or a stressed forced time or a day and minute assignment.

The ASDF Miracle

Something that has always amazed me is the ability that our brain-finger connection has to type. Without thinking about where the letters on the keyboard are, we’re able to think of a word and then have it come up on the screen at almost talking speed. The interesting thing about this is that this is not an inborn skill. Our brain is not pre-wired to know that on the middle line of the keyboard will be the letters ASDFGHJKL. That’s not even consistent with the ABC’s order that we learned when we were little. Through practice, most people who have access to a computer are able to pick up this learned, incredible skill.

So what’s the limit then? If we can teach our body to move our fingers and produce words without even looking, what else could we teach our bodies to do? Professional balancers, artists, athletes, and musicians do this all the time by picking up new skills and teaching their body to react in the right ways. It will be interesting to see what small and large tasks the future will produce (such as the T9 texting method or new ways to drive a car or new interactive video games) that the body will be able to learn and perform.

The 4th Verse of the Star-Spangled Banner

Few people realize, or choose to not realize, that the national anthem was written to have 4 verses. The first 3 verses ask questions. Can you see the flag? Does the banner yet wave? What is that breeze? Where is the band of soldiers? Take the first verse for example. As I’m sure you know, it reads:

O! say can you see by the dawn’s early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight’s last gleaming,
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,
O’er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets’ red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there;
O! say does that star-spangled banner yet wave,
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

The verse ends in a question mark. OUR "national anthem" ENDS IN A QUESTION MARK. That's because it's not the anthem. It's 1/4th of it. The verse consists of two questions asking about if the flag is still high. It doesn’t answer anything. And yet, this is the verse we sing. I bet that 98% of people in the United States don’t even know the lyrics to any of the other verses.

It is the FINAL verse that ANSWERS the questions. It proclaims things! It’s bold. It’s awesome. It reads:

O! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand
Between their loved home and the war’s desolation.
Blest with vict’ry and peace, may the Heav’n rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: “In God is our trust;”
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Do you see that? It ends in an exclamation! Freeman shall stand! War’s desolation, VICTORY, PEACE, Conquer we must, In God is our trust. The banner SHALL wave, and this is the land of the free and brave. The 4th verse is amazing. It answers all the questions of the first 3 verses.

Please, please can we sing the 4th verse at baseball games or in church or at all the events that we sing it? Francis Scott Key MEANT to put the best verse last. It is the verse that says what we are. It’s amazing. I sing it with pride. The first verse asks two questions and says nothing.

Sorry to be controversial, but please, let’s sing the 4th. It’s part of the anthem just as much as the 1st verse. And it’s epic.

Grandpa Jay

Earlier this week I had the opportunity to talk with my Grandpa Richardson one final time. I called up Grandma and she put me on speaker so that I could just talk with Grandpa one on one. He wasn’t able to speak back but I really felt like he could hear and understand what I was saying. I thanked him for some of the good memories I had had in Arizona in the dentist chair or at reunions or of him visiting Ohio. I thanked him for his great example. I felt most impressed though to thank him for the great posterity that he has raised. He gave me my wonderful mother. He had sons and daughters who became very influential and wonderful examples as my aunts and uncles. And the grandchildren that he has influenced have become some of my very best allies and friends. His influence will continually be felt for generations.

Thanks Grandpa for your humble example of goodness and for keeping your priorities in the right place for your whole life. I'll love and miss you!

Body Temperature

Not long ago I worked at a biathlon on a semi-chilly morning. I was inside collecting the data and typing up the results for most of the morning. My friend Loren, however, was out by the finish line for the 3-hour duration of the activity. About 30 minutes after the activity Loren and I were driving back to our office and she kept commenting on how cold she was. The day had warmed up considerably, however, and I really couldn’t tell how in the world she was still cold. What I had failed to realize, though, was that her body temperature had been lowered from being outside all morning, whereas mine had been retained from staying inside.

So many times we think people are coming from the same place that we are. We assume that they are in our same mood, that they have the same homework load, that they have the same family situation, and that what we hold important or as a priority is the same for them. What we feel (the current temperature) fails to account for their “body temperature” that is affected by who they are and what they have done and where they have been.

80/20

Last night I was talking with someone whose grandma had given them a great theory on dating. She called it the 80/20 rule.

I think everyone in the back of their mind, or on a typed-out list, or in what they've told people, have an idea of what their 100% significant other will be like. Maybe the "100" is very similar to you, maybe they have certain physical characteristics you've always been looking for, maybe they they have certain qualities of confidence or tact or kindness that you will not give up for anything. But maybe it isn't the "100" that we should look for.

We should, according to the theory, look for someone who has 80% of the things we "need", and granted there are definitely some things that you shouldn't budge on, but then also be ready to accept the other 20% of things that surprise us. Maybe you weren't expecting to date a blonde, to date someone a little quieter than you had expected, or who had had different life experiences than you had planned on. But I have learned lately that in having an 80/20 relationship, the differences make both of you stronger. Going for someone 80% "similar" to you is far from supporting the adage that "opposites attract", but the fact that it's not 100 is strengthening. Both then have to sacrifice, compromise, grow in new areas, and shrink in old ones in order to create a dynamic, new, and meaningful relationship. You are able to relate on many things, but it's also quite an adventure diving into their soul and discovering the differences.

And most of us, me especially, are too picky for their own good. The 80/20 rule helps you find the person you're looking for with the same basic standards and goals, but also allows you to be willing, ready, and excited to embrace and enjoy the differences.

1,398 Days Later

In the past 1,398 days I have seen my brother Braden in person for only 7. In the other 1,391 I’ve briefly spoken to him on the phone on 6 occasions and seen his face on Skype only once. We haven’t had a Christmas, Thanksgiving, or Halloween together since the winter of 2006. But on May 6th, that will all change.

Do you ever feel like there’s someone in the world who knows you better than anyone? Someone who knows exactly how your mind works, knows what your motivations and values are, knows where you’ve been, where you’re at, and where you’re going. Someone who you can be your complete and exact self with because they require no explanation. Braden is one of those people to me.

It might be because we shared a room since the day he was born. It might be because we both like seeing results, but are both definitely ready for quirky random adventures. It might be because of the thousands of hours playing Adventure Castle, block wars, board games, matchbox car role playing (each car with a name that ended in a “Y” for some reason) or the fact that every single family board game turned into a Braden vs. Travis death match. It might be because of our teamed-up teasing of our lovely sister Camille or comradery/mentoring of Derek (me trying to make him more dream-chasing, and Braden trying to make him more practical). Whatever it is, we know each other more than anyone ever has.

For the past 4 years we’ve e-mailed each other once a week, missing only two or three weeks out of the 200. For the first half of those years they were sent from Taiwan to America, and the last half from America to Russia. We’ve filled each other in on school, on baptisms, on girls, on exchanges, on our family, on scriptures, on our dreams, on our futures. Every week I can honestly say I looked forward to his e-mails more than any other piece of real or electronic mail. Because even in the time we’ve been apart, I’ve never felt closer to him. And whether he was home earning the Monson Scholar award and conducting a flash mob, or at Russia being a leader and changing people’s lives, I’ve never felt so proud of being his brother.

Next year we will once again be roommates. And another one of our best friends, younger brother Derek, will be in town as well. Party? Yes.

Braden my brother. I am so excited to have you back!

Snowball

Once upon a time I was an EFY Counselor. I was put on the Variety Show committee and was therefore involved in the auditions.

A girl named Grace made a decision to try out. Her voice was really good. She got in the talent show.

A year later she was at BYU and I ran into her and we became friends since I remembered her from the talent show.

The next year, because I remembered how well she sang I asked her to audition for GleeYU, the music group I started. She made it in.

During a concert, the administrator of the BYU events team, saw Grace and talked to her afterwards.

Grace was offered a job on the events team, loves her job, and is finding new windows of opportunity from the job every day.

All because she decided to audition for the talent show at a summer camp in high school years before.

It’s interesting how one little decision leads to other things down the road. If she had never auditioned, she would not have been given the job that she has now. I think it says something about always being ready to seize opportunities. It’s worth it to apply for that scholarship, to try out for that team, to go to that event, to meet that extra person. Who knows what your seemingly small decision will lead to in the future. Who knows what kind of chain you’ll be able to make one day that says, “Because I did this…that happened”, “because of that, this opportunity came up”, “because of that situation, I was able to achieve this”, “and because I decided to do this one little thing in April 2011, all of that happened.”

So go do that one little thing, for it is April 2011.

Bowling Shoes

Bowling Shoes: the best investment you’ll ever make.

Think about it. Where do bowling alleys make their money? Games are often pretty cheap. Most of the time people go to the alley when a free game is available or if they got a coupon or a two for one deal. But there are always those shoes to buy. Because we can’t have those customers scratching up the floor with their “street shoes”. I would love to see the business model of these bowling alleys.

Think of every time you’ve gone bowling. Now multiply it by the $2 you have spent to rent shoes every time. Say that in your life you’ve gone 100 times. That’s $200. Now go to ebay. Look at all those shoes you can get for $5 that even offer free shipping. Now think of the future 300 times you’ll go bowling in your life. Bowling’s not leaving American culture anytime soon. By simply taking 5 minutes to figure out your shoe size and push “buy” on ebay, amazon, or craigslist, you could save about $600.

It’s so satisfying to go to the front counter, show them your own pair of fancy maroon and navy blue bowling shoes, and go bowl for about 1/3 of the costs that you usually do. Please. Please do it. For me. For all that is good about capitalistic America. Stick it to the bowling industry and maybe even go win a free game by bowling a turkey.

And on the flip side, the bowling shoe “look” is pretty in right now anyways. Save money, and be stylish while doing it.

Proof It

One day in my business class, the following joke was told. Once there were three penguins. The first penguin jumped into the water and yelled, “here goes nothing!”. The next penguin followed suit by jumping off the cliff yelling, “here goes nothing!”. Finally, the third penguin looked over the edge, and after much anticipation, yelled, “Seven!” and jumped off the cliff. Immediately, nearly my whole class erupted with laughter. I had no idea what was funny about that joke….so I did not laugh.

Turns out that the teacher was conducting an experiment. Before the class began he had told a few of the students that when he said the punchline, that they were to begin laughing regardless of if the joke was funny. So they did. The other students in the class, finding themselves in a situation where they didn’t know what to do (because the joke wasn’t really funny and they didn’t know if they should laugh or not), laughed anyways because that’s what everyone else was doing.

This little phenomenon is called “Social Proof”. Basically, when people find themselves in a situation in which they know nothing about it, they will automatically look to see what those around them are doing and then they will do it themselves. Kind of ridiculous in theory and kind of sad, really, but it’s the truth.

That’s why in the comedy shows they put on “laugh tracks” of huge crowds laughing after jokes. Because then we can laugh at the joke even when it’s not funny. Has anyone ever noticed how ridiculous it is that we are watching a TV show and there is audience laughter the whole time? It’s why sometimes people will form lines, even though they have no idea where the line is leading. Because if other people are forming a line, it must be the correct thing to do. It’s why at a basketball game if you didn’t actually see the shot go in or hear the bad call or even know what happened, you will clap or boo right along with the crowd, because you don’t know what’s going on, but you will follow the crowd because of social proof. It's used in doing class assignments, in driving, in friend interactions, in weekend plans, in most everything.

So before you do anything this week, I’d challenge you to ask yourself why you are doing it. Is it because you find yourself in an uncertain situation and are choosing to follow the social proof the crowd provides, or is it because you are deciding for yourself. It’s so refreshing to weigh the alternatives, make a decision based on your own standards and criteria, and then go for it.

And seriously, next time you watch TV, notice the audience randomly laughing in the background. It’s weird. Think about it.

Snooze

Last week I tried a little experiment.

During the middle of a morning at home, I set my alarm. Every time it went off, I would hit the snooze button, thus allowing it to ring 5 minutes later. For the next hour, I would hit the snooze button 12 more times, measuring out each 5-minute increment of my life.

It was amazing to see how quickly time passed. It seemed as though every 30 seconds I would be turning the alarm off. I found myself being ashamed for how little I had accomplished in each 5-minute segment, and ultimately in the hour. To my surprise, little distractions on the computer, a desire to eat a poptart or chocolate chip handful, staring off into space, and staying on one activity for needlessly too long, seemed to bite away my time in huge chunks.

Time is the only thing that we can never get back. And the man who uses each of his 5-minute increments the best will most likely be the most successful, the happiest, and the most satisfied for how things have turned out 70 years down the road.

Try out this little phenomenon for yourself and you’ll realize how much time goes down the drain every single day. And then you can do something to change, and to start living life each second that you have!

2011

I love sitting in airports, having time to think about where I’ve been and where I’m headed. I also love New Years- a time to think about the past year and to think about what lies ahead.

As I sit here in the Cincinnati Airport on New Years Day 2011, the combination leaves me not knowing what to think. Thoughts about my brother coming home from Russia in a few months, my sister moving away from Provo to Boston, my girlfriend waiting for me across the country, seeing my “little” brothers starting to grow up up up, me moving apartments and starting a new chapter, interviewing for an internship on Tuesday, experiencing another Christmas and reflecting on all the past ones, celebrating my 23rd birthday, starting all new classes, zeroing in on career and important life decisions….and on and on. And to add to that, I just finished reading “The Hunger Games” series and “The Five People You Meet In Heaven”- two things that’ll get you thinking no matter where or who you are.

I wonder what goes on in the heads of all these people sitting in the terminal- also in some kind of beginning and ending.

I think back on 2010. Two semesters at my beloved BYU, folk dance, Into the Woods, Murder Mystery, 2 months in beautiful Alaska, dates and dating galore, owning my first car (I love you Jamie Rose), roadtripping across the country, working as an EFY counselor, starting the business school, making great friends, starting a Glee group……

All these things happen. People and things come and go. And it all leads to right now. Everything always leads to right now. Everything I have done or seen and everyone I have met and mixed lives with has led to this moment. And on New Years of 2012 all that’s going to happen this year will have led to that moment. The days and years slip by and we’re always living Right Now. It's hard to put into perspective how much "doing" things really means.

I don’t really know where this is going. The airport/New Years effect is really just muddling my thoughts all together. I like to end my blogs with a challenge to the reader. With an invitation to do or change something. But you know what? I don’t have one this time. Just live life to the fullest so that at all times, all the things you have done can lead up to this moment and you can be proud of who you ARE, not so much what you have done. Because what you have done will always be in the past.

Now go have one heck of a 2011.